Visiting the Cemetery

Today...  my wife and I drove up to the cemetery where her son from a previous marriage is buried and I sat in the car while she walked the short distance by herself to put new flowers in the holder by his grave stone.  Before she left the car her comment to me was, "I don't guess you are going since he's not your son...  ya know, by not going you are disrespecting my son..."

I just sat there in the driver's seat and did not say a word, nor did I say a word during the ride back to our house...   but, while I did not say a word, I continued to think about what she said and reminded myself that when we went to visit her mother's grave site, I did not get out of the car...  and, she never said a word to me about it...  and, I have not visited the grave sites of my parents after their deaths even though we have been to that area several times to visit my sister.

This has nothing to do with her son...  I believe that she is finding one reason after another to find fault with me or criticize me to lay the foundation for divorce or for her to have an affair both of which I wish would happen so we can finally be done with this marriage.  Ironically, our marriage turned SOUR almost immediately after she retired about 3 years ago...   which says to me that we don't have enough in common for us to spend all this time together...  it was easier to tolerate each other when one or both of us was working.

Sadly...  and, this is looking back on 22 years of marriage (27 years of living together), we should have never gotten married in the first place...