Tuesday, July 9
Message From the KING
To the citizens of the United States of America from His Majesty King Charles III:
In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
His Majesty King Charles III will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which he does not fancy).
We will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. It will of course be someone of proper English lineage, such as Dame Judi Dench or Michael Caine, but most certainly not Simon Cowell.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
1. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut'
without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (Look up 'vocabulary.')
3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as 'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'
4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.
5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
7. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.
8. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.
9. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.
10. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full Kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).
11. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.
12. An internal revenue agent (i.e., tax collector) from His Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).
13. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.
God Save The King!
US Medicare Part G
Say you are an older senior citizen and can no longer take care of yourself and need Long-Term Care, but the government says there is no Nursing Home care available for you. So, what do you do? You opt for Medicare Part G.
The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G) and one bullet. You are allowed to shoot one worthless politician*. This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning, cable TV, a library, and all the health care you need. Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart? They are all covered!
As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now!
And, who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can't afford for you to go into a nursing home.
And you will get rid of a useless politician while you are at it. And now, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any more income taxes!
Is this a great country or what?
Now that you have solved your senior Long-Term Care problem, enjoy the rest of your week.
*FYI: Some folks are already complaining that you are limited to only one US politician.
In The NEWS
Sports, Entertainment, & Culture
> Jon Landau, Oscar-winning producer best known for "Titanic" and "Avatar," dies at age 63 (More) | Khyree Jackson, Minnesota Vikings rookie cornerback, dies in car crash at age 24 along with two former college football players (More)
> Professional wrestler and actor John Cena announces he will retire from the WWE in 2025 after over 20 years with the company (More)
> Emma Navarro upsets fellow American No. 2 seed Coco Gauff to advance to Wimbledon quarterfinals (More) | Spain, France, Netherlands, and England reach UEFA European Championship semifinals (More)
Science & Technology
> The UK releases first-ever guidelines for use and generation of stem cell-based embryo structures; biological models allow researchers to study early fetal development and potentially develop treatments for congenital disorders (More)
> Analysis suggests the Antikythera mechanism—a 2,000-year-old mechanical device found on a Greek shipwreck—was built to align with the lunar calendar (More) | The Antikythera mechanism, explained (More) | Everything you need to know about ancient Greece (More)
> Second-known living species of vampire squid discovered in the South China Sea; the first type of the animal was formally described in 1903 (More)
Business & Markets
> US stock markets close higher Friday (S&P 500 +0.5%, Dow +0.2%, Nasdaq +0.9%) with the S&P 500 and Nasdaq closing at record highs as latest jobs report raises hopes for interest rate cuts (More) | See previous write-up (More)
> Paramount's board approves Skydance's merger proposal after months of negotiation, paving the way for a formal announcement expected today (More)
> Meme stock influencer Keith Gill (also known as Roaring Kitty) posts indicating possible interest in headphone maker Koss, sending shares up 25% Friday (More)
Politics & World Affairs
> Rival Sudanese factions meet in Egypt for reconciliation talks as war approaches 15-month mark, with a reported death toll of over 16,000 people (More) | See background on the war (More)
> Israel-Hamas cease-fire talks set to resume after Hamas reportedly drops demand that Israel commit to ending war, clearing hurdle for US-proposed cease-fire plan (More)
> House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D, NY-8) holds a virtual meeting with committee members to discuss calls for President Joe Biden to step aside from the 2024 race amid concerns over his mental fitness (More)
SOURCE: 1440 News
Electric Vehicles
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When Joe Biden took over the office of POTUS, one of the first acts he did was cancel the XL Pipeline, wage a war on gasoline, pushed for climate change and for everyone to buy electric vehicles or hybrids. His war on gasoline caused him to reduce the emergency gasoline reserves and to buy dirtier petroleum from foreign countries, increasing the cost of gasoline at the pump.
But more importantly, his push for electric vehicles was just as much of a disaster as his withdrawal from Afghanistan. The general public did not want electric cars and when EVs were purchased, the driver found out that there were not enough charging stations around the USA the support EVs. Other experts have warned the US power grid is simply not strong enough to support the EV push by the administration.
Those loyal Americans who wanted to support the President by buying hybrids, found out that replacement batteries were $8-$10,000 as the original battery only lasted a little over five years. Of course, hybrid car salespersons failed to share that piece of information unless the buyer was sharp enough to ask the right questions.
As a result, Biden destroyed the American economy when he and his staff misinterpreted the EV industry and market. And, instead of taking the responsibility for his actions, he BLAMED DONALD TRUMP.
What kind of a righteous leader blames his predecessors? Not the kind of leader we want as President, I'll tell you that.
The EV and Hybrid auto market has declined tremendously as Americans refuse to buy either kind of vehicle.
Obviously, the hybrid market is the way to go if the industry can solve the problem with the cost of the battery and the time it takes to charge the battery.
One of my neighbors said that a battery needs to be developed that can be easily swapped out like a tank of butane gas for a grill. The old battery is taken out, a new battery is put in that has been fully charged, and the car is on its way in about 10 minutes. The buyer pays a small fee for the service.
What is important to remember here is that there is nothing wrong with changes as long as it has been properly planned out. It is obvious, at least to me, that Biden and his team had not properly planned.
Denisovans on the Tibetan Plateau
Excavations at Baishiya Karst Cave on the Tibetan plateau are revealing details about the
lives of Denisovans, a group of ancient humans about which little is known. Dongju Zhang’s group/Lanzhou University
Denisovans survived and thrived on the high-altitude Tibetan plateau for more than 100,000 years, according to a new study that deepens scientific understanding of the enigmatic ancient humans first identified in 2010.
Researchers analyzed thousands of animal bone fragments unearthed at Baishiya Karst Cave, 3,280 meters above sea level near the city of Xiahe in China’s Gansu province — one of only three places the extinct humans were known to have lived. Their work revealed that Denisovans could hunt, butcher and process a range of different large and small animals, including woolly rhinos, blue sheep, wild yaks, marmots and birds.
The team of archaeologists working at the cave also uncovered a rib bone fragment in a layer of sediment that dates back between 48,000 and 32,000 years, making it the youngest of the handful of known Denisovan fossils — a clue that the species was around more recently than scientists previously thought. READ MORE...
Monday, July 8
Stay Aware of your Body's Health
My wife and I drove up to the Bristol hospital yesterday because her 84-year-old brother had just undergone bladder surgery. He lives in a small town in Virginia off of Interstate 81, and the first hospital that his son took him to a town bigger than where he lived but still small enough to only have a visiting Urologist surgeon.
This surgeon requested supplies from a larger hospital and when they arrived, the surgeon said the wrong supplies had been sent and after 15 more hours of debating what to do, his son got so pissed off at the doctor that they sent him to Bristol.
We later found out that the supplies that had been sent were correct and that they had been sent by the Bristol surgeon who then performed the operation. What we found out later was that the urologist surgeon was so young that he had never performed this type of operation and instead of admitting that he did not think he had the skills, told a lie.
This lie caused my wife's brother to experience severe pain for 15 hours until he could be transferred to this other hospital.
Should this younger doctor lose his license to practice medicine?
The other issue is that one must realize that the worst doctors are going to be found in these smaller cities.
Had this young doctor been on an ego trip and decided to perform the surgery for which he was totally inexperienced, since it was so complicated, he probably would have killed my wife's brother.
Fortunately, my wife's brother went through surgery performed by an experienced surgeon, and we are all thankful that it ended up the way it did. Her brother had a severe bladder blockage and cancer that had been around for quite a while. Cancer that has been around that long, even if it is slow growing usually transforms into aggressive cancer because nothing has been done to stop it or slow it down.
Once a biopsy, lab tests, and a CT scan have been performed we will be in a better position to understand the extent and prognosis of his cancer... but it does not look good. However, all sorts of new cancer meds have been developed so maybe it will not be a bad as we fear.
But the point of all of this is that you can feel TIP TOP or maybe experiencing no discomfort, pain, or loss of weight and cancer can still be growing inside of you. Cancer can also be misdiagnosed so it is up to you to make sure you do not have a complacent attitude or even rely on the doctors to diagnose your illness.
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN HEALTH.
There is a tendency to trust doctors too much. Get second opinions. Find out what your insurance will allow or will not allow. Be aware of changes in your body even it they are subtle.
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