The Golden Question

You really wanted to quit your job.

After months of careful planning, you figured out how to turn your side hustle into a full-fledged business--and you built up the courage to do so. So, you handed in your resignation.

Immediately, your boss tries to convince you to stay, promising a huge raise.

• It's tempting.
• You start having second thoughts.
• What should you do?

Some years ago, I learned a practice that helps me to get control of my emotions in challenging situations like this one, so that I make better decisions.

It requires asking myself what I like to call, the 'golden question.'

The golden question
The golden question is actually five questions in one, and goes like this:  When you need to make a decision under emotional circumstances, ask yourself:

How will I feel about this in:

• a day?
• a week?
• a month?
• a year?
• 5 years?

The reason why this question is helpful has much to do with the way our brains process emotions.

When it comes to higher level executive functions (such as the capacity to plan, organize, and exercise self-control), we typically engage the frontal lobe(s), the largest part of the brain. But when we feel some type of emotional threat, another part of the brain known as the amygdala "hijacks" the brain, often resulting in a fight, flight, or freeze response.

Emotional hijacks can be useful in certain situations. But they can lead us to say or things we regret.

Here's where the golden question comes in.

By forcing yourself to see how this decision will affect your future, you switch back from using your amygdala and re-engage your frontal lobe.  READ MORE