On Being a Father

 

My daughter was born in 1972 while I was still in the Navy and stationed at Norfolk, VA.  I was on leave, when she was born but had to return that same day. Four months later, I was honorably discharged and two months later, I enrolled in college while I was working full time.

Even though I received the GI Bill, I still worked full time which left me with very little time to be with my daughter. Two years later, I graduated and immediately became employed with a company that had me working over 60 hours a week.

Guess what?

I had very little time to spend with my daughter.

My daughter was a freshman in college, when her mother and I got a divorce.  I set up a Trust Fund before the divorce that would pay for four years of college plus give her $10,000 when she graduated.

My daughter and I stay in touch with each other regularly, until about 7 years ago, when all of sudden she quit communicating with me, offering no explanation.  I reached out several times but she did not respond.

My parents were not touchy-feely parents and never emotionally supportive of me, and I acquired those same behaviors.  While I was not as strict on my daughter as my parents had been on me, I still was not emotionally supportive, nor was I there very much while she was growing up.

I have no idea if that is what contributed to her desire to quit communicating but I am sure it had something to do with it.

If you are a new father and reading this, please learn from my lesson and be there for your children as often as you can otherwise you might regret it like me.